I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
