I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
