I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Watching her eat just hurts me
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
