I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
