It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
