Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
