My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
