Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
