You work out of a Hotel?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Got upgraded to First Class and now Iβve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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