no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
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