Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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