I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
