Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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