you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Randomize