it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
