He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
