i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
