There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize