Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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