someone get that fucking seahorse.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
