operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
