Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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