What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
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