spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
