it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Randomize
