Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
