u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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