I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
