Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I want her autograph on my taint
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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