apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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