is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize