Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
