its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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