oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
