this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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