I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
