DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
