don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
