She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
