This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
She even gives head with a lisp.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
