Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
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I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
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I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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