im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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