I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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