so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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