a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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