You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
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