And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Randomize