just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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