Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i will never coherently bang her
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I need to calm my uterus...
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
