OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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