She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
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